This has been a long week. I have really been dreading that for the first time EVER I will not be able to participate in every single holiday event going on this weekend with my kids. I will be missing Easter Egg hunts, possibly the first sight of the goodies left by the Easter bunny, getting my children all dressed up for church, going to church, lunch, supper....you get the picture. Except that is something that I will also be missing, pictures:( Yes, I have to work a 12 hour shift Saturday and a 12 hour shift Sunday....NIGHTS! I have to sleep at some point especially on Sunday since I have to gear up to go back Sunday night. If you have never worked nights before then you don't realize how it is virtually impossible to not fall to the floor and be sound asleep the very second you walk through the front door. It is nothing like day shift jobs where you come home and cook, play with your children or watch TV and then get ready for bed. In fact...I think I sleep half the drive home.
Tonight we were driving down the road and passed by a church. As a testament they had a large cross right on the side of the road and had a real live man standing on a small platform with his arms extended across the cross. He literally looked as though he was nailed to the cross...a real live man! That may not affect some people but it did me. I also witnessed the look on my sweet daughter's face when she realized the reality and meaning of Easter. I am very ashamed to say that I don't have the Bible down pat. I still have to look at my cheat sheet beside my computer just to remember my favorite Bible verses.
This week I have worried instead of handing it to him. I have been upset about my situation all the while he knew that my situation would be exactly what it is at this exact moment. I have felt slapped in the face by the good Lord the past few weeks. I still continue to try to push forward with my own plan but he keeps reminding me that it is not the plan he has for me.
He died so I could live! He didn't die for me to hold myself down over my own situation no matter how big or small my problem is. He is taking me somewhere amazing. Somewhere that I can't even imagine. He makes changes daily to guide all of us to where he wants us. I know first hand that your entire life can change, be it good or bad, in a single day or even more so in a single minute! As we wait to see what is next he already knows and has prepared that place for us.
He died so that I could live!!!!