My mornings since Tegan has been in preschool have been busy with cleaning house, sewing and school work. Some how I am still just as behind as I was when I didn't get anything done with him here
I am going to admit I was mad. Super mad at myself and fuming at my husband b/c why on earth do we not have a key hidden somewhere outside of our house!!! I mean really, isn't this his fault:) I sat in 108 degree temps(maybe a little less) on the front porch, sweating and thinking of all the things that I wasn't going to get accomplished before class including my HOMEWORK! I was aggravated and playing the why me game and then it hit me...stop and think about it, pray about, let it go! So I sat down on my beautiful front porch swing which I never ever take the time to enjoy these days and said a little "please calm my insides down" prayer.
Day after day I make plans...plans for our future, my kids future, my mornings, my days, my year but really does it matter what I plan for?? Nope it sure doesn't b/c I don't get to choose all of the days that are laid out before me. I have worried an awful lot lately about my schooling and if I am making the right future career decision but today my prayer has changed to "I will go where you guide me". Ultimately every minute of every day I am right where I am suppose to be even if that place won't be the same when I wake up tomorrow. The past four years of my life have taught me to learn from things and not be burdened by them. So yes, today I go to school with the goal of a radiography degree in mind but tomorrow I may be traveling the world on an airplane (with a mask and gloves on to protect me from the germs). Even though I know it is unlikely for me to be doing that tomorrow I also thought it was unlikely that I would be married at 20, that I would bury a child at 2006, that I wouldn't fulfill my dream of having 7 children or that I would be back in school all these years later. The point is you just never know when change will happen and where the good Lord might take you from day to day even if it is on a swing in the horrible heat with no distractions and no one to talk to but God. That swing was right where I was suppose to be today and most importantly, right where I needed to be!