Friday, September 14, 2012

I Am That Mom

I have recently come to the conclusion that any mother that doesn't yell and get all crazy on their kids and husband from time to time, must have them locked in a closet with duct tape over their mouths and slides their food to them under the door:)

This morning I was that mom.  You know the one....
she gets up on the wrong side of the bed (late I might add).
She ask for her husband's opinion of whether their child (who had a fever the day before) feels hot and if he thinks he should go to school.
Then she gets all crazy on him when he says he should go to school b/c she is sure that he is only saying that b/c he doesn't want to have to take the daughter to school while mom stays home with the sick son.
Then she checks in to see what her daughter is wearing to school and tells her to change b/c she is wearing one of her mom's t-shirts that is three sizes to big for her.
That daughter then proceeds to get a little sassy which results in the mom  getting all crazy on her and she may or may not of told the daughter that since she doesn't want to wear her own clothes, she will get 3 shirts and one pair of pants to wear the whole winter.
The daughter then cries b/c the mom won't let her pick out her own clothes and given that the mother was yelling at her, she honestly believes that she is only getting 3 shirts and one pair of pants for winter.
The son who looks sick but doesn't have a fever at the moment, insist that he has to go to school today b/c he doesn't want his "friend" (don't call her his girlfriend) Ella to play with any other boys.
But yet she has to once again yell at him to get him to get up off the couch and start getting dressed.
Dad leaves for work in a hurry and tells the son to take him some medicine before he goes to school.

Background....son H.A.T.E.S medicine.  That is both positive and negative.  Positive: hopefully he will never do drugs.  Negative:  he gags to the point of puking when you give him medicine.  He will not take medicine for his mom at all but he will take it for his daddy.  Whatever.

Dad leaves and mom is stuck with a daughter crying b/c she can't be her own person and son crying b/c his dear dad informed him that medicine was in his near future. 
At this point, mom has done nothing to get her own self ready to walk out the door.
She puts brushing her teeth and throwing on jogging pants at the top of the list but nothing else gets done.
She then prepares herself to force her son to take some medicine.
Since there is no time to let him sip it from a medicine cup for the next 30 minutes, she is forced to give it to him on a spoon.
Son is crying and gagging before the medicine is even poured up.
There was this brief moment that he accidentally took his hands away from covering his mouth, had his eyes closed and mouth wide open letting out a nice big cry.
It was now or never people!!!
Mom slips that spoon right in his mouth and the gagging starts but mom doesn't back down.  No she holds his mouth closed so that the medicine has to go down his throat and not all over her kitchen floor.
Medicine is in but the kid is still crying.....GET.OVER.IT.ALREADY!!!
Daughter has walked out the door b/c all the screaming from me and her brother is cutting in to her awesomeness.
Mom grabs a towel (that was probably dirty) to wipe the tears off of the sons face.
 It was at that exact moment while the son stood on her cream colored carpet that he decided to throw up not only the medicine but the grape juice that he had just been drinking.
No worries people, like a superhero in slow motion, mom caught the throw up.
Yes, she caught the throw up.
The son had cried until he threw up.  Did I mention that the medicine had all came up.  15 minutes of fighting with her son, down the drain!!!
Mom walks out the door in the t-shirt she wore to bed last night, no make-up and only half her hair up and it isn't the right half either b/c the stupid lady had her hair cut and now the entire top layer is to short for her beloved ponytail and it requires at least 15 minutes of straightening with her very best straightening iron.
Everybody makes it to the car and mom demands for it to be silent on the car ride.
Son and daughter happily hop out of the car and look like they have had a great morning.
Mom instantly has mother's guilt for all the yelling, rushing and force feeding of medicine.
SO MUCH GUILT!!!
 Mom then comes straight home and  walks in the door to the phone ringing.
You will never ever guess who it is on the phone.
The school....come pick up your son.  He is sick and has a fever!!!





8 comments:

  1. I LOVE THIS!! I'm not laughing at you...I am laughing with you. This is me, at least one day a week. So many times I said to myself (and other people, I might add), I will never be, 'that mom'. Here I am, 3 kids later, and yes, I am that mom! Embrace it, Tabby Cat. I love you for your honesty. Being a parent/wife/mom isn't always glamorous, but it's who we are. Thanks for posting. It made me smile.

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    1. I am totally laughing now....this morning, not so much! I wouldn't trade it for the world. Miss you Becca!!!

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  2. oh my!!! I am so Laughing with you. I thought I was the only mom on earth that had bad mornings of Yelling and frusteration. Hope the rest of your day has went well.

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  3. I, too, am that mom. I've been the one crying taking the kids to school out of guilt for how much I yelled that morning. My boys pray at night that I won't yell so much, but they leave out that they could have better listening ears and behavior thus warding off such horrible yelling!

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  4. I, too, am that mom. I've been the one crying taking the kids to school out of guilt for how much I yelled that morning. My boys pray at night that I won't yell so much, but they leave out that they could have better listening ears and behavior thus warding off such horrible yelling!

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  5. I love the way you wrote this!! Too funny!

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  6. Oh, how many moments I've had like this. You captured it beautifully. Forgive yourself. We're all giving our kids plenty of material for therapy in the future -- that's our job as parents.

    I hope it's a very long time before you have a morning like this again.

    Happy Sharefest. Have a great weekend.

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  7. Haha. It's okay, I'm that Mom too. I yell. And I admit it freely.

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